Like war we will never change”
|Civil Rights||Economy||Political freedom|
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The United States of Nukapedia has now been founded in the The East Pacific and we can now start to vote on our issues. Every week I will bring you a number of issues, each with a number of solutions which you can all vote on. The most popular solution will be put through.
About our nation
The United States of Nukapedia is a huge, safe nation, renowned for its sprawling nuclear power plants, ubiquitous missile silos, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-working population of 717 million Nukapedians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.
The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vault City. The average income tax rate is 41.2%.
The Nukapedian economy, worth 47.1 trillion bottle caps a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Arms Manufacturing, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is 65,674 bottle caps, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.9 times as much as the poorest.
People are now classified as male, female, or genderqueer, recruitment posters proclaim the army to be both fabulous and fashionable, the government is spending millions on renovating the public transportation system, and the latest Harry Potter book is a bestseller. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Nukapedia's national animal is the deathclaw.
Nukapedia is ranked 3,379th in The East Pacific and 72,583rd in the world for Most Politically Free, scoring 48 on the Diebold Election Inking Scale.
National happenings are quick snippets of information which update every time we pass legalization.
- Following new legislation in Nukapedia, the latest Harry Potter book is a bestseller.
- Following new legislation in Nukapedia, the government is spending millions on renovating the public transportation system.
- Following new legislation in Nukapedia, recruitment posters proclaim the army to be both fabulous and fashionable.
Last week's issues
Painful Prices Paid At The Pump
Commuters are complaining about the ongoing rise in gas prices, causing a massive debate in the government about what should be done.
no Solution One: "Who cares about a few trees?" says oil executive Mary Rikkard. "Gas prices are six bottle caps per gallon, and rising! There is lots of oil to be found in areas currently protected as parks! Solving our energy needs is more important than conserving the environment. Just give us permission to go in there and start drilling, and gas prices will plummet!"
yes Solution Two: "There are other ways to recover from the fossil fuel crisis besides ruining forests," says environmental activist Ruby Barry. "We shouldn't just take the short way out and drill here. I suggest spending more money on public transportation systems and encouraging people to carpool - if people weren't so reliant on fossil fuel powered cars, we wouldn't be in this situation in the first place, and if we start using less oil, the price will drop with the demand."
We opted to agree with Ruby Barry and give more funding to public transport and encourage carpooling.
Harry Potter Censorship Row The latest "Harry Potter" book to hit schools across Nukapedia has stirred up the greatest controversy yet.
no Solution One: "I quite enjoyed the book, until I got to the part where Harry summons evil demons to do his bidding," says religious leader Steffan Rubin. "Now that's just wrong. We need to restore some sense to this debate, by which I mean we should remove this book from the shelves, salt it thoroughly, and burn it."
yes Solution Two: Teachers union President Fanny Lopez says, "Come on, the book is fantasy! And it's a damn good read. I'd like the government to issue a statement of support for our teachers and librarians, so kids can enjoy good books without interference from religious wackos, like Christians."
We opted to agree with Fanny Lopez and issue a statement of support for teachers and librarians in favor of allowing books regardless of what religious groups say
We Need A Few Good Men Who Like Men?
With military recruitment numbers down, there's been some discussion in civilian circles of relaxing 'sodomy' regulations in the armed forces in order to allow homosexuals to serve openly. However, with the occasional reports from the field of suspected homosexuals being beaten by their squadmates, some wonder if such measures are really appropriate for the notoriously conservative culture of Nukapedia's military.
no Solution One: "There will never be room for gays in our God-fearing service," says Army Chaplain Orel Roze, absent-mindedly fingering the religious device of his office on his lapel. "I mean, uh, think about what it would do to morale. In the military men have to eat, live, and sleep in extremely close quarters and even consensual sexual relationships in the chain of command leads to leadership problems. It's just a natural extension of fraternization rules... and not only that, but our current policy is actually a service to the poor misguided souls, since it prevents any temptation to act on their given perversion... I mean preference."
yes Solution Two: "God doesn't enter into it," says Air Force Lieutenant Colonel Charles du Pont, head shaking. "Times are changing, and people are becoming more accepting of homosexuals. We have women in the military, and that surely leads to 'temptation', but for the most part everyone's quite professional about it. Allowing homosexuals to serve openly will increase our recruitment pool and actually simplify things; just look at the Navy: hundreds of horny men in steel boxes in the middle of the ocean for up to six months at a time... there has to be a reason that people volunteer for that, right?"
no Solution Three: "This coming from some pampered soul in the Chair Force," scoffs Commander Virginia Harishchandra, calling in via satellite from aboard a destroyer. "Inter-service rivalries aside, ever read some of those ancient sagas about cities being besieged? Those ancient cultures had no problem with homosexuality; actually, it strengthened their resolve and spirit because they were literally fighting alongside their lovers, and anyone in the service will tell you it's all about the guy standing next to you. Now, what if--and this is just a hypothetical, mind--based on this and to counter years of discrimination, only homosexuals were allowed to serve?"
no Solution Four: "That's... interesting, but it doesn't really address the problem, does it?" asks Lance Corporal Alexander de Groot, part of your honor guard. "Let's look at it this way: only ten percent of the population is homosexual, right? No matter what, the majority will be heterosexual. We want homosexuals to serve, but there will always be a backlash against them. No regulation changes are needed if you just pen a policy where sexual orientation becomes a taboo subject in discussion--not like it's anyone's business to talk about their sexual interests in a professional military, right? This way homosexuals can serve, albeit quietly, and be happy, and the moral conservatives stay happy since the military is still 'officially' anti-gay. Of course, if anyone's pulled out of the closet, their career is instantly over, but that's the cost of compromise."
no Solution Five: "We still have a military?" questions your Minister of Peace, scratching his unruly hair and smelling none too vaguely of patchouli. "Man, I thought we got rid of those war pigs ages ago. Y'know, if you'd just listen to me and go with flowers instead of firearms, this whole gays-in-the-military thing wouldn't be such a buzzkill all the time. Hey, speaking of buzzes, I just got these mighty strong Bigtopian Blues from a guy I know. I'm on one right now and they are far OUT. You wanna expand your mind with me? No? That's cool too."
We have opted to agree with Air Force Lieutenant Colonel Charles du Pont and allow open homosexuality in military ranks
This week's issues
Click though the tabs to view and vote on the different issues.
Auto Industry Struggles Against Foreign Imports
Cheap, foreign-made cars are becoming increasingly popular, causing concern in Nukapedia's automobile manufacturing industry.
Solution One: "Unless this government does something, Nukapedia won't have an auto industry for much longer," says auto industry union boss Finlay Never, in a rare public appearance alongside management. "These foreign companies employ people for a few bottle caps a day. The only way to level the playing field is to raise tariffs. The government would make more money, too, so it's win-win."
Solution Two: "For once, I agree with my grubby colleague here," says General Chassis CEO Peter Wu. "Although I have to say, tariffs aren't the only answer. A more effective solution would be to abolish minimum wage laws. Now that would level the playing field. And we'd be able to employ more--argh, let go of my throat!"
Solution Three: "I think we need to face facts," says noted economist and chat-show regular Gretel Singh. "We live in a global economy now, and automobile manufacturing just isn't Nukapedia's strong suit. There's no point taking money from taxpayers in order to line the pockets of a few greedy workers and corrupt managers in a doomed industry. Let the market take its--argh, let go of my throat!"
A spectre is haunting Nukapedia — the spectre of the Woodeating Spikeball. With scenic parks ravaged by this invasive species, citizens are clamoring at your door to advise you.
Solution One: "The ecosystem is in great peril," claims Marlon Delauter, an importer of exotic pets. "These Woodeating Spikeballs have no natural predators here. But there is a solution: back in their native Maxtopia, these pests are kept in check by the Sabre-toothed deathclaw. We have to introduce these animals into our forests before it's too late. And you know, since I'm such a nice guy, I'll cut you a deal on the deathclaws."
Solution Two: "You can't stop one invasive species by introducing another," scoffs avid hunter Hope Love while skinning several rabbits on your desk. "Just give out hunting permits for these Spikeballs, and we'll have the population under control in no time. You know what, might as well extend hunting and fishing seasons for other animals too. I've been itching to bag myself a Giant Lilliputian Rabbit."
Solution Three: "We shouldn't be left at the mercy of our citizens," counsels gendarme Max al-Zahawi while barely suppressing his hatred for animals. "If you want something done right, you gotta do it yourself. Let's send out our boys in blue to go hunt down these vermin." Frothing rabidly, he finishes, "That way we can be sure every last one of those mangy, stinking, filth-ridden pests is dead!"
Solution Four: "So what if these Spikeballs are eating all the trees?" says thoroughly apathetic citizen Agnes Peters. "Nature got along fine for millions of years before we came into the picture. Just let survival of the fittest run its course. Sure, we might lose a few species or ecosystems along the way, but at least we'll save some money. Forests are really boring, anyway."
"Don't Dam Our Rivers, Damnit!" Say Protesters
A group of Greenpeace protesters have called for an end to a government proposal to begin damming rivers in Nukapedia to increase water supplies and generate power.
Solution One: "Don't build dams!" shouts protestor Roger Rubin through a microphone heavily afflicted with feedback. "Do you know how many fish die in other dams in our region each year? Have you heard of the adverse effects building a dam has on the surrounding environment? Dam up this flood of dams, damn it!"
Solution Two: "Think before you open your mouth," says engineer Hillary Cruz. "While Nukapedia may have to pay the price in animal diversity, as well as adverse effects on the environment, do we really want fossil-fuel based plants polluting Nukapedia? If you use your common sense, I think you'll find that damming some rivers would be a good idea. Plus, think of how much the economy would benefit from all the jobs these projects would create."