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The United States of Nukapedia has now been founded in the The East Pacific and we can now start to vote on our issues. Every week I will bring you a number of issues, each with a number of solutions which you can all vote on. The most popular solution will be put through.
About our nation
The United States of Nukapedia is a huge, safe nation, remarkable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, daily referendums, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-working population of 669 million Nukapedians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.
The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vault City. The average income tax rate is 42.0%.
The Nukapedian economy, worth 43.4 trillion bottle caps a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Woodchip Exports. Average income is 64,896 bottle caps, with the richest citizens earning 5.1 times as much as the poorest.
A typical fast food menu item could serve a small army, nude art is becoming wildly popular, scientists recently cloned the long-extinct feather-bellied deathclaw, and people are now classified as male, female, or genderqueer. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Nukapedia's national animal is the deathclaw, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.
Nukapedia is ranked 3,220th in The East Pacific and 71,629th in the world for Most Politically Free, scoring 48 on the Diebold Election Inking Scale.
National happenings are quick snippets of information which update every time we pass legalization.
- Following new legislation in Nukapedia, people are now classified as male, female, or genderqueer.
- Following new legislation in Nukapedia, scientists recently cloned the long-extinct feather-bellied deathclaw.
- Following new legislation in Nukapedia, nude art is becoming wildly popular.
Last week's issues
Is It Art Or Is It Porn?
Vocal members of the Moral Minority have been complaining and petitioning the government about the new art gallery displaying several provocative nude portraits by several famous artists. Moral Minority members claim these pieces of work promote prostitution and indecent sexual acts.
no Solution One: "Stop my children from looking at smut! These artists are only perverts pretending to be artists! Think of the children!" says Stan Zhu, proud member of Parents Promoting Purity. "These artists are only going to rouse our innocent children to commit grotesque acts of immorality! Get rid of it all!"
no Solution Two: "Well, I see that point, but we certainly don't need to ban inoffensive art, still lifes of inanimate objects, and such," says your sister, Ruby Barnes. "Perhaps we should set some guidelines for what is acceptable as art and what isn't. Artistic renditions of people getting it on are one thing. A bunch of fruit in a decorative bowl is another entirely."
yes Solution Three: "That is censorship!" says noted art history teacher Elizabeth Thiesen. "You can't ban art! It's freedom of expression; it's part of our culture. If anything, the government should be supporting these artists and their work, not listening to these prudish whackjobs who are scared of a little bare skin!"
We opted to agree with Elizabeth Thiesen and allow all forms of art
Genetics Brings New Life to Extinct Species
Scientists have announced they are close to a breakthrough in their quest to revive the feather-bellied deathclaw, a species related to Nukapedia's national animal that has been extinct for more than a century.
yes Solution One: "I, for one, applaud their work," says scientist Freddy Longfellow. "And not just because I'm the project leader. This is an example of how Nukapedia's brains can mix it with the world's best. Can you imagine how wonderful it will be to have feather-bellied deathclaws frolicking in the meadows again? I say full steam ahead, and more government funding!"
no Solution Two: "This is a sacrilege!", says religious leader May Zhimo. "These animals are extinct because God wants them dead. Cloning them would merely incur his wrath! If we proceed down this path, it'll be humans, not the feather-bellied deathclaw, who will be extinct."
no Solution Three: "Now, come on," says Bharatendu de Vries, well-known philosopher. "You don't need to be religious to be unnerved by the top of this particular slippery slope. Today it's deathclaws, tomorrow it's dinosaurs, and we all know how that turns out. This research shouldn't be banned, but there must be strict government controls over its use."
We opted to agree with Freddy Longfellow and give more goverment funding to resurrecting dead species
Transsexual Demands Recognition In Chosen Gender
After the tabloid magazine "The Bun" outed a supermodel to have been born male, the state has annulled her marriage to her husband.
no Solution One: "I have gone through twenty years of internal pain about my external appearance and I put so much effort and money into finally having the world see the real me!" says transsexual activist Tobias Li. "The government needs to recognize my true gender as well as cover the surgeries and medicines needed to get me where I am today!"
no Solution Two: "Transsexuals are delusional if they think they will ever be members of their gender they wish they were." says right-wing radio show host Fanny O. "It is a biological fact that our gender is determined by our chromosomes, anyone who tries to act like the gender they are not should be immediately arrested and taken to a psychiatrist!"
yes Solution Three: "You know everyone, gender isn't a black and white proposition," states self-identified "genderqueer" Stan Cheswick. "There are XX males, XY females, and many people who have ambiguous sexual characteristics or just don't feel they belong in categories such as male or female. The government must recognize our existence!"
We have opted to agree with Stan Cheswick and recognize the right to identify differently to your gender.
This week's issues
Click though the tabs to view and vote on the different issues.
Painful Prices Paid At The Pump
Commuters are complaining about the ongoing rise in gas prices, causing a massive debate in the government about what should be done.
Solution One: "Who cares about a few trees?" says oil executive Mary Rikkard. "Gas prices are six bottle caps per gallon, and rising! There is lots of oil to be found in areas currently protected as parks! Solving our energy needs is more important than conserving the environment. Just give us permission to go in there and start drilling, and gas prices will plummet!"
Solution Two: "There are other ways to recover from the fossil fuel crisis besides ruining forests," says environmental activist Ruby Barry. "We shouldn't just take the short way out and drill here. I suggest spending more money on public transportation systems and encouraging people to carpool - if people weren't so reliant on fossil fuel powered cars, we wouldn't be in this situation in the first place, and if we start using less oil, the price will drop with the demand."
Harry Potter Censorship Row
The latest "Harry Potter" book to hit schools across Nukapedia has stirred up the greatest controversy yet.
Solution One: "I quite enjoyed the book, until I got to the part where Harry summons evil demons to do his bidding," says religious leader Steffan Rubin. "Now that's just wrong. We need to restore some sense to this debate, by which I mean we should remove this book from the shelves, salt it thoroughly, and burn it."
Solution Two: Teachers union President Fanny Lopez says, "Come on, the book is fantasy! And it's a damn good read. I'd like the government to issue a statement of support for our teachers and librarians, so kids can enjoy good books without interference from religious wackos, like Christians."
We Need A Few Good Men Who Like Men?
With military recruitment numbers down, there's been some discussion in civilian circles of relaxing 'sodomy' regulations in the armed forces in order to allow homosexuals to serve openly. However, with the occasional reports from the field of suspected homosexuals being beaten by their squadmates, some wonder if such measures are really appropriate for the notoriously conservative culture of Nukapedia's military.
Solution One: "There will never be room for gays in our God-fearing service," says Army Chaplain Orel Roze, absent-mindedly fingering the religious device of his office on his lapel. "I mean, uh, think about what it would do to morale. In the military men have to eat, live, and sleep in extremely close quarters and even consensual sexual relationships in the chain of command leads to leadership problems. It's just a natural extension of fraternization rules... and not only that, but our current policy is actually a service to the poor misguided souls, since it prevents any temptation to act on their given perversion... I mean preference."
Solution Two: "God doesn't enter into it," says Air Force Lieutenant Colonel Charles du Pont, head shaking. "Times are changing, and people are becoming more accepting of homosexuals. We have women in the military, and that surely leads to 'temptation', but for the most part everyone's quite professional about it. Allowing homosexuals to serve openly will increase our recruitment pool and actually simplify things; just look at the Navy: hundreds of horny men in steel boxes in the middle of the ocean for up to six months at a time... there has to be a reason that people volunteer for that, right?"
Solution Three: "This coming from some pampered soul in the Chair Force," scoffs Commander Virginia Harishchandra, calling in via satellite from aboard a destroyer. "Inter-service rivalries aside, ever read some of those ancient sagas about cities being besieged? Those ancient cultures had no problem with homosexuality; actually, it strengthened their resolve and spirit because they were literally fighting alongside their lovers, and anyone in the service will tell you it's all about the guy standing next to you. Now, what if--and this is just a hypothetical, mind--based on this and to counter years of discrimination, only homosexuals were allowed to serve?"
Solution Four: "That's... interesting, but it doesn't really address the problem, does it?" asks Lance Corporal Alexander de Groot, part of your honor guard. "Let's look at it this way: only ten percent of the population is homosexual, right? No matter what, the majority will be heterosexual. We want homosexuals to serve, but there will always be a backlash against them. No regulation changes are needed if you just pen a policy where sexual orientation becomes a taboo subject in discussion--not like it's anyone's business to talk about their sexual interests in a professional military, right? This way homosexuals can serve, albeit quietly, and be happy, and the moral conservatives stay happy since the military is still 'officially' anti-gay. Of course, if anyone's pulled out of the closet, their career is instantly over, but that's the cost of compromise."
Solution Five: "We still have a military?" questions your Minister of Peace, scratching his unruly hair and smelling none too vaguely of patchouli. "Man, I thought we got rid of those war pigs ages ago. Y'know, if you'd just listen to me and go with flowers instead of firearms, this whole gays-in-the-military thing wouldn't be such a buzzkill all the time. Hey, speaking of buzzes, I just got these mighty strong Bigtopian Blues from a guy I know. I'm on one right now and they are far OUT. You wanna expand your mind with me? No? That's cool too."