Like war we will never change”
|Civil Rights||Economy||Political freedom|
The United States of Nukapedia has now been founded in the The East Pacific and we can now start to vote on our issues. Every week I will bring you a number of issues, each with a number of solutions which you can all vote on. The most popular solution will be put through.
About our nation
The United States of Nukapedia is a huge, safe nation, renowned for its ubiquitous missile silos, irreverence towards religion, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-working, cynical population of 542 million Nukapedians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.
The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vault City. The average income tax rate is 43.4%.
The Nukapedian economy, worth 32.9 trillion bottle caps a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Uranium Mining industry, with significant contributions from Woodchip Exports, Door-to-door Insurance Sales, and Book Publishing. Average income is 60,764 bottle caps, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.7 times as much as the poorest.
There have been reports of people marrying housepets, the wearing and manufacture of fur apparel is banned, welfare funding has recently gone through the roof, and pharmacies close down as medicinal drugs are sold freely by the government. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Nukapedia's national animal is the deathclaw, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.
Nukapedia is ranked 1,862nd in The East Pacific and 63,709th in the world for Most Subsidized Industry, scoring 13 on the Gilded Widget Scale.
National happenings are quick snippets of information which update every time we pass legalization.
- Nukapedia was reclassified from "Compulsory Consumerist State" to "Father Knows Best State".
- Following new legislation in Nukapedia, pharmacies close down as medicinal drugs are sold freely by the government.
- Following new legislation in Nukapedia, welfare funding has recently gone through the roof.
- Following new legislation in Nukapedia, the wearing and manufacture of fur apparel is banned.
- Nukapedia changed its national capital to "Vault City".
Last week's issues
Licence To Breed?
Increasing reports of child abuse and neglect in Nukapedia has prompted local pressure groups to call for 'parental licences'.
no Solution One: "You need a licence to keep deathclaws or drive a car," points out local current affairs commentator, Elizabeth Wong. "So why should just any random idiot get to be a mother or father? It just doesn't make sense! If all potential parents had to pass tests to prove they're responsible enough, I'm sure you'd find that it would help decrease the level of child abuse, and increase proper discipline in the home."
no Solution Two: "This is madness!" screams Mohammed Zhu. "You can't deny perfectly good people the right to bring life into this world! deathclaws manage it easily enough, and you can't tell me they've got more responsibility than your average upstanding citizen of Nukapedia! The government should keep out of such matters - I've always said social workers and welfare was a drain on the budget. Yes, there will be some sad cases of neglect, but shouldn't we be giving parents the benefit of the doubt?"
yes Solution Three: "The answer to this problem is patently obvious," says Colleen Patel, your Minister of Social Welfare. "The government simply needs to give more funding to the welfare department so that we can recruit more social workers to carry out regular checks on parents and judge whether or not they're doing a good job of looking after their children. It'll be expensive, but at least it's a damn sight fairer than licensing parents."
We opted to agree with Colleen Patel and give more funding to social welfare
Private Lab Holds Nukapedia's Sick To Ransom
Scientists at a private medical research laboratory have announced that they have produced a drug which will combat Nukapedia's most notorious malady - Spon Plague.
no Solution One: "This pill is the only known and unknown cure for the Spon Plague!" proclaims Professor Ivan Silk, the inventor of the cure. "But if we are to go ahead with the production of this drug, we must get some government support. We're set to make a fortune from this drug - the money we earn will help us develop even more cures for other as-yet untreatable diseases. Some people won't be able to afford it of course, but hard cheese on them: they should have got a paying job while they were still capable."
yes Solution Two: "That's a disgraceful way to think!" says equal rights activist Ryan Usman. "So the people who need the most help shouldn't get any? I propose that the government subsidises the production of all drugs so everyone can benefit from them, rich or not! That way the money-hungry corporations won't profit from the suffering of the masses. Of course there will be the matter of a small tax rise to fund it - but what's that when lives will be saved?"
no Solution Three: "I can't believe what I'm hearing," deplores well-respected religious leader, Matilda Strange. "If God didn't want people to have this disease he wouldn't have created it in the first place. This is completely against the will of God and if the government allows this drug to go on sale we will all be doomed to an afterlife in a dark and fiery place! Now let's end this madness and abolish the production of pharmaceuticals and drugs altogether!"
We opted to agree with Ryan Usman and have the govement subsidies the production of all drugs
Hackles Raised Over Fur Clothes Debate
Several animal rights groups have protested the continuing use of fur as a material for clothing.
Solution One: "This is an outrage!" cries Bharatendu Rikkard, president of the Be Nice To Animals society. "The manufacture of fur apparel is unethical, cruel, and disgusting! People just don't seem to realise that millions of animals die each year in fur farms, crammed into tiny cages and suffering the most terrible treatment just so someone can look appealing and rich! This is a sick practice and must be stopped! The same can go for leather shoes and snakeskin belts too."
Solution Two: "You can't mean that, surely?" snorts Gretel Falopian, adjusting a hat made from real deathclaw hide. "It's the people's choice what they wear. I don't think it's fair that the majority of the public should be deprived of fur clothes because some people are a bit queasy. In fact, if the government would allow us to stock rarer animals, we could produce even finer products. In the end, it's up to the consumer, don't you think?"
We have opted to agree with Bharatendu Bikkard and ban the use of animal fur or hide in clothing.
We have opted to name our capital city "Vault City".
This week's issues
Click though the tabs to view and vote on the different issues.
Outed Teacher Ousted
A religious high school in Vault City has caused quite a stir after firing a teacher because of his homosexual orientation.
Solution One: "I can't see what they did wrong," says Ryan de Vries, proud parent and founder of the Holier Than Thou prayer group. "Homosexuality is an apostasy onto everything we stand for and believe in! I don't want my children to be exposed to it. Teachers are role models for their students for heaven's sake. I say all sodomites should be banned from teaching at all schools in Nukapedia, lest the contagion spread."
Solution Two: "Prohibiting people from doing their jobs just because of their love life is utterly ridiculous!" shouts a mad-as-hell civil rights activist, "Don't we live in modern society? Giving these fundamentalist idiots what they want is a huge violation of human rights. All people should be able to do their jobs, whatever their sexuality!"
Solution Three: "This is yet another example of what harm religion does to our society," says LGBTQ activist Finlay Change, waving a rainbow flag. "Homosexuality shouldn't be a taboo subject anymore. Children ought to be brought up knowing that sexual diversity is just something that exists in society and is completely normal. To help society move forward, we need to get rid of religious schooling and teach that people should love whoever and whatever they want."
You Just Sank My Battleship!
Last month the Nukapedian Navy's flagship scandalously sank while docked in the Lahabana Harbor. After analysis, experts concluded the primary cause was rust from poor maintenance.
Solution One: "Can't you see we need a hand in the navy?" complains Commodore Emily Leach while directing a diving crew, "How are we supposed to maintain our fleet if our routine maintenance budget is so paltry? Bigtopia has better warships, and you can't tell me they're a martial powerhouse. Grant me as much funding as I need so this doesn't ever happen again."
Solution Two: "This only proves that battleships are obsolete," concludes Jacob Jefferson after watching the newest Star Trek movie, "Nukapedia needs weapons to combat the problems of the 23rd, I mean 21st century. We need to start research and development of an interstellar fleet or we'll be left behind in the arms race against... I dunno Klingons?"
Solution Three: "I know the real cause of this catastrophe," claims Crazy Boris, your least reliable spy, "Blackacre is obviously behind this attack. The signs of sabotage are everywhere." He takes a swig of vodka before continuing, "The engine explosion was most likely caused by my old nemesis, Ussa Maddox. Give me a free hand and I'll purge the spies that have infiltrated every level of Nukapedia."
Solution Four: "You're all ignoring the bigger problem!" shouts a protester outside your office window, desperately trying to catch your attention, "That sunken battleship is polluting the environment horribly. All kinds of chemicals are seeping from the wreckage, and we're doing nothing to clean it up. Instead of building yet another war machine, how about we clean up some of our old messes, starting with this shipwreck."
Unconventional Weapons Under Fire
A collection of citizens, civil rights workers, and concerned mothers have signed a petition to stop the manufacturing of the 'BFG-69' (AKA 'the Organ Grinder'), a new rifle planned to be used in the military which works by shredding people's internal organs.
Solution One: "If we don't produce these weapons we will be left behind in the arms race," says Lauren Bronte, director of the Alliance of Rifles, Grenades, and Handguns. "These weapons are the future and it won't just stop with the BFG-69. We're planning on introducing the Bone-Breaker 542-DX Sonic Rocket Launcher next year along with our anthrax grenade line. If Nukapedia is going to stay ahead of the game then it'll just have to accept that highly destructive weaponry is part of life. We'd also like to sell it commercially to your police force and citizens if you'd just sign here...?"
Solution Two: "This rifle is completely inhumane," says Dr Bharatendu Dubois, leaning on a cane. "These weapons are unnecessarily violent - how can anyone condone something that rips apart your innards like this? How long do you think it will be before these new inventions get into the wrong hands? Shootings are bad enough but at least most people are just wounded. The BFG-69 and those of its ilk are lethal in the extreme and are completely unacceptable! We need some moral decency here and get rid of these unconventional weapons along with all the other shameful armaments like mustard gas."
Solution Three: "Excuse me, but whenever has anyone ever heard of a weapon that WAS humane?" asks Sashona Never, ballistics expert. "These are devices for firing slugs of metal at people. It's not nice, but it IS necessary. People are always so squeamish. They've already accepted the standard ripping through the body of the standard bullet but the moment something a little more effective is made they kick up a fuss. Typical. These nonstandard weapons should only be put into trained military hands anyway. We're not making rocking horses here, we're protecting Nukapedia against her enemies! Just this once, let's try to stay ahead of them."