Chapter 1: Intro and Getting to know the Basics
Hello, Im fireburn12, Modern Survivalist of the Blood Moon that happened in 2003 and all my life I have been preparing for this day, ever since 2003, when the Demo-Version of the blood moon happened, The Blood Moon that happened in 2003 was not even half, not even a quarter, not even a nickle of what is/what has happened. Thats why I Fireburn12, am going to teach you what happened, and whats going to happen on the night of the Blood Moon and how to prepare for it.
1. Are you a doomsday prepper, with gas mask's and a bunker? GET RID OF THAT! Thats pointless! The wont help you at all!
2.Guns, get plenty of Guns, do not stop and think "Why would I need this many guns" thats only the Illuminati-Jackals going into your head and try to make you weak.
3. EMP! ALL ELECTRONICS ARE DOWN!
4. Have boatloads of swag, if you dont, your dead
5. Know how to quick scope, if you dont know how to 360 no scope you are dead.
5.5 (Optional) Join Faze Clan, this will help you...
6. Stocking up food? Pointless
7. Get water. Water bottles?! NO! a Water hose, from a fire truck, you will need this to take out the lava-men
8. It last's the entire night, when the night is over all the monsters go into hiding, check your attics, basement, bunkers, sex dungeons for any monsters that might come out...
Chapter 2:that stuff above is barely going to help you, but this will...
When I was surviving the Blood Moon in 2003 I learned a few monsters and how to deal with them
Monsters: 1. SUPER ULTRA SWAGGINATOR: This thing carries a fedora,a trilby, an over coat, and a My Little Pony Shirt, the only way you can kill him before he kills you with his 360 no scope is by saying "Rainbow dash has a nice ass and I jerk off to her every night". This will make him rage so much his head will explode.
2. Reptilian-Nazi-Zombies: these guys are brutal, these guys are tough, these guys are brutally tough. Trust me on this one, you have to yell out "Mein Fuhur" if you want to leave your house, pass a checkpoint (they Set up Check Points around, killing then eating people) or enter a house. DO NOT try and kill them...
3. The Raider: You think these are the raiders from Fallout!? Keep Trying bub, these guys are like chuck borris and Kim Jon Il combined, they make super empty threats like "Were going to nuke you!" and they wont do anything, but anger them, and they will do nothing, but anger them again and they will still do nothing, but angering them again might just get you hit you with a round house kick to the leg, you can kill these, but they are a waste of ammo, they do nothing, thought they are good for keeping as a house pet...
4. Hell-Hounds: Ever played Nazi Zombies in COD, those are it
5. Chinese Hell Hounds: If you happen to order Chinese food and get "Chicken" there is a possibility that you will get this, and it will jump at you and try to eat you, not to mention it will stab you over and over again with chopsticks, the only way you can avoid this is when the Deliverer brings you the food you yell out in a extremely loud Asian voice, to the point where it is considered racist, "YOU GOT A B ON YUR MATH TES! YOU ARE ASIAN! NOT BSIAN!"...The box will then burst into flames, incase you want to make sure.
6. The 666: Run away from these guys at all cost, no matter how far just run
Finally The Last one, this is the worst one.
7: Undead-Nazi-communist-Zombie-Vampire-Warewolf-Hitler-Stalin-Ninja-Mech-Shrek-Chupacabra-Rambo-Kim Jon Il and Un-Karate Kicking-Gigantic-Mechromancer-Jason-Freddy: DO NOT APPROACH THESE GUYS, RUN AT ALL GOD DAMN COST'S. YOU WILL SEE THEM COMING FROM THE DISTANCE BUT THE MOMENT YOU SEE THEM YOU NEED TO RUN GET IN YOUR CAR AND DRIVE TO ANOTHER STATE.
Chapter 3: Snacks
Peanut Butter Crackers: These taste like shit, but they are good snacks to watch the coming apocalypse, and the lunar eclipse
Pizza (With ranch sauce): This taste's okay, though be careful, the pizza might turn into demon flying pizza's, They are still edible though, and pretty tasty, especially with ranch....
Any Alcoholic Beverage: (Corona, whiskey, Bourbon): Yes these are good, and the annoying talking and smell of bad breath leads the Reptilian-Nazi-Zombies away.